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At the age of 38, I met my partner, and like many couples at this stage of life, we believed that raising children was not part of our future. However, life can be full of surprises, and at the age of 42, I unexpectedly found myself pregnant. This news was a combination of shock and joy, but it also brought with it a wave of anxiety. In the chaotic early years of motherhood, I often worried that my already limited energy would deplete even further as my child grew.

As the months turned into years, I gradually shifted my focus to prioritizing my health. Through this journey, I discovered several lessons that reshaped my approach to wellness and self-care.

Health Is No Longer an Afterthought

In my youth, as a single woman reveling in spontaneous weekends, I had a rather lax approach to health. I regularly consumed alcohol, exercised only when the mood struck, and avoided medical appointments unless absolutely necessary. However, my experience as a parent brought about a significant change in this mindset.

Now in my 40s and approaching my 50s, I have made regular visits to my primary care provider and gynecologist a top priority. Admittedly, it took time to cultivate this habit. Balancing routine health check-ups often felt like just another obligation on my exhaustive to-do list. Moreover, I have to consider the financial implications, even in Europe, where I reside, where medical expenses can accumulate quickly.

Over time, I came to understand that prioritizing my health is not merely about extending my lifespan; it’s about enhancing my quality of life in the present moment. I used to think that feeling perpetually exhausted was simply part of being a parent. However, I’ve realized that this mindset not only affects my well-being but also hinders my ability to be the best parent I can be. Routine check-ups can uncover issues, such as a vitamin deficiency, that are easily manageable but can have a profound impact on daily life.

For my 53rd birthday, I decided to treat myself to a comprehensive medical examination, which included blood and urine tests for cancer, a mammogram, and, on my doctor’s suggestion, a bone density test. The results were eye-opening; I was diagnosed with osteoporosis, which finally explained the muscle aches and fatigue I had attributed to my hectic lifestyle. Armed with this knowledge, I now take prescription calcium and have tailored my exercise routine to focus on building bone density and boosting my energy levels.

Good health is a holistic concept. It encompasses not only physical fitness but also emotional and mental well-being. I have found that when I prioritize my health, I am more present and engaged with my daughter, allowing me to genuinely enjoy our time together. This transformation has made every effort to maintain my health so much more worthwhile.

Incorporating Regular Exercise

Once I embraced parenthood, I was determined to make exercise a regular part of my routine. However, after repeatedly skipping my Saturday morning dance classes, I recognized the need to adopt more convenient methods to fit physical activity into my day.

One of the simplest yet effective changes I made was to walk everywhere and monitor my daily steps, aiming for a target of 5,000 to 7,000 steps each day. Swimming has always been a passion of mine, so once my daughter started attending school, I committed to swimming at least once a week in the mornings. Additionally, following the onset of menopause, I incorporated weight training into my regimen, although, on particularly hectic weeks, this sometimes translates to simply wearing a weighted vest during my walks.

In my earlier years, my motivation for working out was primarily aesthetic—achieving a summer “beach body.” Today, my fitness goals are centered around building stamina, strength, and sustainable energy. My driving force is the desire to be an active and involved parent, not just now, but as my daughter grows into her teenage years and beyond.

The Importance of Sleep

I have always leaned toward being a morning person, yet this did not prevent me from engaging in late-night activities, whether scrolling through my phone until the early hours or enjoying mid-week drinks late into the night.

Once my daughter was born, I began to truly value the importance of sleep. As she grew older, I made it my mission to secure at least 7 to 8 hours of quality sleep each night. I quickly realized that without adequate rest, I became irritable, less patient, and ill-equipped to navigate her concerns, worries, or the seemingly endless tales about her friends.

By establishing sleep as a non-negotiable part of my life, I have found that I can manage my daily responsibilities more effectively while providing my daughter with the attentive parenting she deserves.

Mindfulness Practices Are Essential

My journey into motherhood began with a C-section that required general anesthesia, followed by complications in the form of a post-surgery blood clot. This tumultuous experience left me feeling anxious and unsettled during those initial weeks. Fortunately, I discovered that practices like meditation and kundalini yoga helped me regain my sense of calm. Since then, I have continued to integrate mindfulness techniques into my daily life.

As my daughter navigates her teenage years, she, too, has experienced her share of anxiety. I have introduced her to various mindfulness practices that have proven beneficial, not only for her but also for strengthening our bond. Our ability to step back and reset during moments of frustration has defused countless potential conflicts.

Ultimately, the key takeaway is that my daughter deserves a mother who is strong, engaged, and energized, regardless of her age. As an older mother and a woman, I also deserve to feel my best, allowing me to fully embrace the joys of motherhood both now and in the future.