As I sit here working from home, I can hear my husband, a dedicated stay-at-home dad, having a blast with our two sons in the other room. The sound of their laughter fills the air, reminding me of the joy they share, but also of my own feelings of FOMO the fear of missing out. It's a bittersweet experience, knowing they are having fun while I am immersed in my freelance journalism work.

Having a stay-at-home husband was an intriguing shift in our family dynamic, one that felt novel at first but has since become our normal routine. Nearly a year into this arrangement, we've found ourselves settled into distinct roles: I focus on my career, while he takes charge of the kids during the hours they are not in school or daycare. Despite the happiness that comes from our chosen paths, I have encountered unexpected reactions from both our social circles and from within myself.

My husband, who initially had little interest in children, has truly blossomed in his role as a dad. His enthusiasm for spending time with our boys is palpable, and its heartwarming to hear their delighted squeals during his silly games. When he left his last full-time job feeling unfulfilled, he quickly decided that being a stay-at-home dad would bring him more satisfaction. This choice also opened the door for me to transition from part-time work to a full-time career, creating an environment where both of us can thrive.

One of the most surprising aspects of this arrangement has been the depth of knowledge my husband has gained about our children. He often surprises me with insights into their preferences from their favorite foods to their clothing needs information I might have overlooked during my busy workdays. For instance, there have been times when Ive been ready to serve a meal only for him to kindly remind me that our youngest no longer enjoys that particular dish. These moments leave me feeling a bit out of the loop, as though Ive lost some of my parenting edge.

Despite my full-time career, I still engage in family life as much as I can. We share responsibilities like drop-offs and pick-ups equally, and I pitch in with household chores whenever I can. On Friday afternoons, I pause my work schedule to take our eldest son to his swimming lesson, and on Saturday mornings, I dedicate time to our youngest. These moments serve not only as bonding time but also as a chance for me to remain actively involved in their lives, even while working from home.

This sense of involvement doesnt stem from mom guilt; rather, it comes from a deep appreciation of the work my husband undertakes daily. He manages a plethora of tasks, from laundry and meal preparation to financial responsibilities and childcare, with hardly a moment to spare. My heart goes out to other moms I know who dont work or only work part-time, as they often face feelings of isolation during the day while their partners are away working full-time.

Yet, amid the joys and successes, FOMO still creeps in occasionally. It can be disheartening to hear the fun and games happening in the next room while Im glued to my computer screen. Even more challenging are moments when our boys have disputes that require adult intervention, making me yearn to step in. Although were in the same house, it can feel disconcerting not being present when they need me most.

Our arrangement has also elicited mixed reactions from those around us. While it may seem surprising, comments and questions about our financial situation are common, despite the fact that stay-at-home moms in our community rarely face similar scrutiny. I often wonder why I am regularly asked about my husbands career plans while no one probes stay-at-home mothers in the same way.

Interestingly, our situation is not set in stone. We're open to change as new opportunities arise. However, I cant help but suspect that if I were to return to being the primary caregiver, the questions regarding my career prospects would diminish significantly.

At family gatherings, particularly with older generations, Ive noticed a tendency to assume that Im the one at home while my husband works. For instance, during a recent get-together, a family friend remarked to my husband, But your wife does all the work, right? These stereotypes can be frustrating, especially since my husband has always been the primary cook in our household. I try to remind myself that societal norms have evolved and not to take these misconceptions personally.

Mom guilt, however, can be a lingering shadow, especially when I reflect on how quickly our youngest is growing up. I remember the special Friday adventures I had with our eldest when he was at a similar age. Now, with my focus on full-time work, I sometimes feel a pang of regret over missed moments with our youngest. Its essential to remind myself that while I was bonding with our eldest, my husband was at work, missing out on those experiences.

Ultimately, what matters most is how our boys are learning that it isnt about which parent takes on the role of caregiver or breadwinner. Whats significant is the love and support that fill our home, regardless of our roles.