Navigating the modern dating world can be a daunting challenge at any age, particularly for those who seek genuine connections. In today’s fast-paced society, where traditional romantic encounters often take a backseat, the landscape of dating has evolved dramatically over the years.

For many, the sheer number of options available—dating apps, arranged setups, social circles, and more—can make finding love feel confusing and overwhelming. With the rise of technology, it seems that despite having more venues to meet people, the journey of dating remains one of life’s most intricate puzzles.

One TikTok creator, Daavi Gazelle, known by his handle @daavilovespotle, has stepped into the spotlight with thoughtful advice tailored to navigating these modern dating waters. His recent video, which has garnered over 207,300 views, offers a step-by-step guide to evolving into what he refers to as a “dating savage.” The term captures the essence of mastering the dating game while still being true to oneself.

Featured prominently in his video are key pointers displayed in a screenshot of his Notes app, as Gazelle walks through the various stages of dating, each accompanied by his insightful commentary.

Step One: Establish Your Pipeline

According to Gazelle, the journey begins long before that first date, emphasizing how important it is to set the stage for meeting new people. “The majority of people have literally no idea where the next person they’re gonna date is gonna come from,” he remarks. He humorously adds, “I’m sorry, but the days of Romeo and Juliet bumping into each other on aisle 3 at the grocery store are behind us.”

Instead, Gazelle advocates for a more proactive approach. He suggests immersing oneself in social environments—whether that involves engaging with college life, attending local events, frequenting bars, or seeking introductions through friends. While he acknowledges that dating apps can be a viable option, he stresses the importance of having a curated method to ensure consistent opportunities to meet new potential partners. “You gotta play in traffic if you want to get hit,” he quips, emphasizing the importance of being present in social scenarios.

Step Two: The Talking Stage

After establishing a connection and embarking on that all-important first date, Gazelle notes that the real work begins. This phase, according to him, revolves around the ability to create a fun and memorable experience without overthinking it. “Can you be fun? Can you be spontaneous?” he challenges his viewers. He suggests that there’s no need to lay all your cards on the table right away—instead, it’s essential to simply enjoy the moment.

As the dating progresses, the challenge often lies in learning how to escalate the relationship comfortably. Whether through body language, subtle flirting, or taking the initiative for a kiss, Gazelle points out that many people find themselves hesitating, which can lead to missed opportunities and ultimately, a lack of connection.

Step Three: Embrace Vulnerability

If the chemistry is palpable, couples will soon encounter what Gazelle terms “the feelings stage.” This critical juncture is where both individuals start to introspect, asking themselves if they genuinely like the other person. Unfortunately, this is also a period ripe for misunderstandings and emotional turmoil. “This stage right here is where feelings get hurt 99% of the time,” he warns, highlighting how miscommunication can lead to conflict—one partner may seek a deeper commitment while the other is only interested in casual dating.

Gazelle’s advice for navigating this pivotal phase is straightforward: embrace vulnerability and communicate openly. “Share yourself. Be honest about what you want,” he emphasizes, encouraging transparency as essential for building a solid foundation.

Step Four: Entering a Relationship

Even upon transitioning into an actual relationship, Gazelle insists that the work does not simply end. Instead, he observes that many individuals fall into the trap of becoming entirely consumed by their romantic partners, neglecting other interests, hobbies, and friendships in the process. “Non-neediness, or basically having a life outside of your relationship, is the No. 1 skill in dates 10 and beyond,” he asserts.

He also cautions against what he terms “grass is greener” syndrome, where individuals in relationships start to fantasize about other potential partners, often overlooking the inevitable flaws that come with any new person. “If you made it to 10 dates with that other girl, you’d see all the stuff that made her messed up too,” he reflects, reminding viewers that every relationship has its challenges.

Gazelle wraps up his video with a vital reminder: it’s not necessary to strive for a traditional boyfriend-girlfriend label if that’s not what you desire. Instead, he encourages individuals to figure out what they truly want from their dating experiences, be honest about those desires, and master each stage of dating along the way. “This video will make you a complete dating savage in all aspects of your life,” he concludes, leaving viewers with a sense of empowerment.

Why This Advice Resounds

Gazelle’s insights arrive at a particularly apt time, considering the challenges many face in the realm of modern romance. A recent survey conducted by Pew Research indicated that nearly 47% of Americans believe dating is more difficult today than it was a decade ago, attributing this sentiment to factors like ghosting, mixed signals, and varying expectations.

Moreover, the annual Singles in America 2023 report by Match revealed that almost 49% of singles still prefer traditional monogamous relationships. Yet, participants also reported grappling with various pressures, including financial stress and isolation. This stress is particularly pronounced among Gen Z singles, who experience loneliness at alarming rates, with over half claiming to feel lonely on a typical day.

Given this context, the ability to clearly articulate wants, navigate the various phases of dating, and maintain authenticity while engaging with potential partners has never been more vital.

Reactions from Viewers

The response to Gazelle’s video has ignited a lively conversation among viewers, many of whom have shared their experiences in the comments section. The common theme among these comments reflects a deep-seated frustration with contemporary dating.

One user pointedly remarked, “You can still meet people at the grocery store if you simply go up to them and tell them ‘I thought you were cute, are you single?’” Meanwhile, others expressed a lack of interest in dating altogether, with one commenter asserting, “Too lazy to date, got a job, a cat, a nice car, gym, and hobbies; now why would I bring a woman into this & potentially ruin the things I’ve worked hard for?”

Another user shared her disillusionment, stating, “As a girl that’s passed dates 2, when I showed interest, he gives up n starts over with someone else. I’m never showing interest ever again.” In contrast, one commenter succinctly stated, “If a man is not dating me and only me after the first date, I don’t want him.”

The Daily Dot has attempted to reach out to Gazelle via TikTok and Instagram for additional commentary. As internet culture continues to evolve at a rapid pace, the complexities of dating remain a hot topic for discussion.

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