Karissa and Kristina Shannon rose to fame as Hugh Hefner's young, vivacious twin girlfriends on the last two seasons of Girls Next Door The twins, who came from humble beginnings, had their lives changed by Playboy, bringing equal parts triumph and tragedyAfter walking away from the entertainment industry and focusing on a path of healing, the two women tell PEOPLE why they're back — and what their hopes are for their next chapter Karissa and Kristina Shannon rose to stardom as Playboy darlings, but today, life couldn't be any further from the glitz of the mansion that helped make them famous. The 35-year-old twins sat down exclusively with PEOPLE, their first interview in six years, to look back at their rise to fame and reveal to fans what they've been up to since. The twins' lives changed practically overnight when at 19, they started doing modeling work. It was a part of their continued grind to make a better life for themselves. "We came from a small, poor Italian family," Kristina explains, adding that the sisters do not associate with their parents "to this day." Born in Howell, Mich., on a family farm, the twins were taken in by their paternal grandmother. "My father was only 19 and my biological mother was 16," Kristina says. "We moved from Michigan to Florida as babies and [were] raised there by our Nonna, who was our adoptive mother." Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE's free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer​​, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. The twins always felt they had to "grow up fast," which played into their decision to drop out of school in the ninth grade. "We had to take care of ourselves," Karissa explains. "So we started working at Ker's WingHouse, which is kind of like Hooters," Kristina adds. "It's the same kind of vibe, but the chain is owned by Crawford Ker, a former NFL player." "That's where our modeling career really started. We worked odd jobs until we were 16, when we started working there," Karissa adds. The brand put a lot of money into marketing and put the twins at the center of it all, plastering them on billboards, menus and their annual calendar. "That was our first centerfold," Kristina recalls. "We had already been modeling, and that's the photographer who actually sent our pictures, did the photoshoot for us to get into Playboy," Karissa adds. "The calendar guy who was shooting all the Ker's WingHouse calendars, that photographer was also submitting photos to Playboy. We were 17." By that time, the two were already fans of E!'s reality series about the brand, Girls Next Door, but never imagined they'd end up being featured on it. "We shot those and we overnighted them and literally got a call the next day," Kristina recalls. "They were like, 'We want to set you girls up for a test shoot in Miami.' And we were like, 'Holy cow.' " "That was our first big production modeling job, that test shoot in Miami. And then they were like, 'We're also interested in you coming and filming for the show in California if things go great here.' Like, they were already telling us this," Karissa says. Karissa remembers the photographer and Playboy crew coordinating the shoot telling the twins that "Hef was dying over the photos. They were like giving us behind-the-scenes confirmation that we would be Playmates, during our test shoot. They said, 'He loves you girls. You guys are in.' " "We knew we were in, and we were so excited," Kristina recalls. "Because we knew it would change our lives. This was changing everything for us." The twins would quickly learn, however, that "what they show on TV and on the show was a 100 percent different from what was going on behind the scenes," Kristina says. "It was such a culture shock for us. We literally ... We didn't grow up with a young mother, so we didn't know about hair and makeup. We didn't know much about fashion or style. And we're a lot younger than Bridget, Kendra and Holly — we're teenagers," Karissa says of the show's stars Marquardt, Wilkinson and Madison, respectively. Plus, it wasn't always easy getting along with housemates. "We were literally just teenagers. We were all natural. We didn't have fake teeth. We didn't have fake boobs like the other girls or fake hair. We just walked around with natural faces over tan because we were always in the sun in Florida," Kristina explains. "We got a lot of jealousy from the other Playmates because we were twins. We were the first twins to each get our own months, which made Playboy history. We were the youngest Playmates and the youngest girlfriends," Kristina continues. The other girls were old enough to go out and party with other friends, whereas Kristina and Karissa were confined to the Playmate house or wherever boyfriend Hefner was going. "Me and Kristina are lucky because we just have a best friend in each other. A lot of the girls got really jealous because when Hef would come around in public settings when we were filming the 55th Anniversary Playmate Search, Hef would show us special attention compared to the other girls," Karissa notes. "When we're taking pictures, he would want to get in the middle of the twins to take a picture. Or he would be like, 'Can you move the twins toward the front of the table? I want to sit next to them.' So the girls started getting really jealous," Karissa adds. She continues, "It made Kristina cry. Kristina literally cried and wanted to leave the mansion when we were shooting. And I told her, 'These girls are older. They know how to play the game better. But we're pretty. We're here. We've made it this far.' And so we ended up staying and Kristina got through it, but there was so much bullying." They shot their centerfold despite their hesitations, enjoying their first time in "full-on glam, full-on hair, lighting and shooting," Kristina says. "We shot it on Hef's tennis court with professional photographers that cost $60,000. It was magic. It was completely different to anything we've ever done," she recalls. The girls were in and out of the mansion over the next three years. They found that "Playboy opened so many doors, but the obligations for the reality show and being girlfriends limited our opportunities," Kristina notes. "We always say Playboy will always be a part of our lives. We were Playboy fans and we still are Playboy fans. Even though it turned out to be very traumatic for us, there were also a lot of high points," Karissa says. "When we moved out, we had a couple of years where we went through this individuality phase. I feel like every set of twins goes through it, particularly in your early 20s," Karissa elaborates. "We were both into different things and trying to be individuals, because Hef really did force the twin thing on us, more than anyone else had ever. But we've always been extremely close. I believe we're twin flames, closer than most twins." Kristina adds, "It's even in the way we were born. We know we were born three months premature ... When we were born, we actually weren't breathing. Our lungs weren't fully developed." "We've had to fight for our lives, our whole lives. We came from a lot of trauma. we're trauma bonded," Karissa says. After rededicating themselves to sticking it out together, they noticed that their time at Playboy had "left a huge hole in both of our hearts and our spirits," Karissa says. "It really crumbled who we are, especially when he took our religion away," she explains. "Our believing in Jesus became a big problem, and losing that was just really big trauma that we dealt with. We had no family that was there to back us up like a lot of the girls." In the years since — particularly after the death of their Nonna and Kristina's DUI, both in 2014 — the two have focused on renewing their faith and finding their way in the world. It started with a rock-bottom moment, in which the two were unhappy with their bodies and the lifestyles. "Everyone was saying we were going through our 'Anna Nicole phase' ," Kristina recalls, nodding to the late Playmate Smith. "We gained weight. There was alcohol and pills. We were really unhealthy and lost and, even at points, suicidal. We had no one. It was just us, trying to figure it out after losing ourselves." In talking about getting on the right track, the two came to the conclusion that they couldn't maintain both a life in the spotlight and a healthy lifestyle. "Kristina and I decided to move. We didn't know where to go, so we decided to go back to where we were born and leave L.A.," Karissa says. "We sold the beauty salon we owned at the time, and said, 'Let's get the hell out of here and live a simple life. Let's just start healing.' " She notes that while it seemed like they two were already washed up, they were just 24. They first settled in Las Vegas before deciding on Ann Arbor, Mich., where they hoped for a new start. "We drove the whole way, without stopping until we got to Michigan. I remember getting into Colorado and smelling that fresh air .. it was just different," Karissa says. "Being in nature desensitized us. We ended up being diagnosed with manic depression, ADHD, bipolar disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. Being outside the city helped us slow down." Karissa explains they took the time "to find out who we are and just be selfish, try and live normally." "We were totally just ready to be selfish for the first time. And we were all about God and praying constantly to Jesus," she explains. "We were literally praying and just trying to change our lives. And I feel like this is when we really grew up." "I feel like out of all of this, God was humbling us," Kristina agrees. "He was humbling us and letting us know, 'I have another plan for you.' He's restoring us and that's what we feel like now. We are completely different people, but still ourselves." She continues, "We're still the playful twins who did Playboy, but we care about other things now. We are all about organics. Everything we eat, all our food is organic. All our water's alkaline, our sheets are organic." "We meditate every day together and we're into meal prepping and not eating out. Really self-care and just taking time for ourselves and learning how to be selfish, learning how to say no," Karissa says. Kristina adds, "We went in our hearts, we went through our healing era, which took years. I didn't think we would ever come out of it. But Michigan changed us. We love being in Michigan and then going to L.A. or Vegas for work." The two have recently started reconnecting with some of their former friends, too, only to find many of them have left L.A. as well. They're also looking for new connections, interested in friendships, falling in love and starting families. The problem? "We cannot be unfamous," Kristina says. "We have tried. Dating does not work. I've tried dating apps and guys won't believe it's me. They want proof and for me to answer all these questions, and I don't always want to explain everything to a guy when we first match." Although they were originally looking for country boys, they found that they do need some elements of city living wherever they end up. "We need a Sephora ... and a Whole Foods," Kristina says. "The small-town did work for privacy and stuff in our healing era, but that's kind of why we're stepping back into the spotlight. We're ready for dating and career opportunities. We're a little bit more ready to be out there again. We're healed and ready to find what we want," Karissa says. "We're in the process of getting our real estate licenses," she adds. "That's our next big thing. And we both really want to be mothers. I mean, our times are ticking here, so if we can't find the husband in the next, what ... then we're totally open to IVF motherhood with just us doing it ourselves." "We really want to do pregnancy together. We want to be housewives, we want to get married, we want to have children. We want to have big families. Since all we have is each other, we want to have big families. It'd be so cool if we could have multiples," Kristina says. "We want to have twins. We both want to have twins," Karissa adds. "I always tell Karissa, I'm like, 'We are going to be a huge scene.' Just wait until she's got a set of twins and I've got a set of twins and then we're twins and we go anywhere. We think the twin questions are bad already, but it's like it's going to get worse because we're going to be a scene," Kristina adds with a laugh. Making big life decisions together is a no-brainer for the twins, who both joke they operate "like a married couple." "And it's funny, because we saw the Olsen twins said the same exact thing. It's so funny. But yeah, because we have to run everything by each other. Every little detail of our lives," Karissa says. "We're closer than ever. And that's why it's like we're so excited. We have a fresh eye on everything now. We're open to a lot of things now and a lot of projects that we want to do. We're interested in doing a lot of different things now," Kristina adds. "We want to be open to our fans so they can see how we're doing now. We want to update our fans on our lives as 35-year-old twins who are a lot smarter and doing things with intention this time around," Karissa notes. Among the possibilities? The two have discussed hosting a podcast or a talk show together, designing organic homewares, writing a book, or even reality TV. "We do love attention. We love the cameras, not in a mean or narcissistic way. We're humble, but we love to entertain," Kristina says. "So we love reality TV because our personality is kind of like people can identify with us and we're really real and honest." In sharing recent photos, the twins proudly revealed they styled and produced their whole shoot. "But we were excited because this is our first time doing a photo shoot in our 30s, as grownups without the X-rated stuff," Kristina says. "People haven't seen us since 2022. We've been in hiding since A&E Secrets of Playboy. It's like the first time our fans are seeing us. We're stepping back out and letting our fans know where we're at, what we look like currently." "We do believe in Botox and some fillers, but we're reducing our breast implants," Karissa says. "We're changing our look. This is our transition in our 30s and you can see it. We're just trying to figure it out like everybody." "We're healing and listening to our inner selves and keeping God first. We transformed our mental and now you can physically see how much better we are. It starts from within and it's all really connected," she continues. "We're excited to work hard, have fun and continue protecting our peace."